narrative: what and how I decided to revise

I decided to shorten the first essay. there was any content that I thought shouldn't have been in the essay, but the essay was ten pages long and had to be made more concise. So I tried to find parts in the first essay that I thought were a little long winded and chop those parts down a tad. This was difficult for me because I thought that I needed everything that I inserted into the essay in the first place. I even thought that I didn't do justice to the period just after I finished high school, because a lot went on during that time in my life as well. y I didn't thoroughly address my experiences in the military. There were things that went on in boot camp that you couldn't imagine unless you were there and I really didn't do justice to the experiences that I had in boot camp. I don't know, I don't know exactly how to go about minimizing my first essay, but I do know that it needs to be more concise. The essay was supposed to be five pages and I doubled that amount with my essay. I guess when you are telling the story of you life and your experiences you don't want to misrepresent any information and you want to be thorough and accurate in every depiction. Either this is the precedent or I am just that much of a perfectionist. In any case this has been a good experience writing this essay, I haven't had this much fun with a writing assignment ever! with the exception of my poetry